Where

Mind is shattered, memories scattered. A little blackout here and there, just to show your sanity who is boss with a little bit of a scare. Drifing father and further away from you old self, erase irrelevant pieces and those you might use again stack them on a shelf. Rusty, wrong and stuck in a rut scary as shit, really pasting a new you together piece by bit. Sense is a long gone thing of the past, white flag hanging at half mast. Darker and deeper tumbling and falling, a minute ago you were puking and crawling? What the fuck happened in that part of a second we call a split, everything changed before your eyes-holy shit! It changed again and again and once more, like your sanity - its gone; no more. Far far gone really far away, i promise you that its not coming back this day. Not one piece of sense i can make of this shit, not the feintest clue not one bit. Lost myself again while searching for the real me, its just hes always been here - i was just to fucking blind to see...

'The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing.'

Socrates

Sadness

So far away from myself yet so near, what and why is this that i so truly and deeply fear? So much sadness, loss and pain, so much character built yet the building nearly drove me insane. So far down the rabbit hole i fell, will i ever find my way out? Only time will tell...
So many times have i seen the writing on the wall, oh how many times did the mighty fall. Paradise lost and found, maybe i can keep it this time round? For once just know which way i am actually heading, instead of always sitting, hating, regetting...
So many 'what if's' constantly in your head floating around, trust me is much fucking worse than what it sounds. Always picking on festering sores freventing them from healing, over and over hating the time and innosense that this shit was constantly stealing...


'Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted.'

John Lennon

750g

Is amazing how your whole life can change in one single choice, how one moment of realisation can change every aspect of your life. From dragging your sorry ass through life hating every single second of every fucking miserable day of your pathetic mere sorry excuse of an oxygen thief to standing on top of the world. Lieterally embracing and celebrating every second of the day. Living in the moment, knowing everything is perfect and all the misery you were wallowing around in was of your own making a horrible reflection of opinion and misinformation. Generational brainwashing just generation upon generation of people being born into a mental prison and handing that horrible gift over to the next generation with all their love and good intetions. Gently placing you into what they think and feel about themselves and their world, with all their love and understanding they throw you into a mental prison built on lies and deceipt yet guarded by love, understanding and good intentions. I am me, i am free... Oraaitythen

'Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.'

Confucius